Accomplishments

Friday didn't start out as a day that I thought would be filled with accomplishments, but in the end it turned out to be a pretty good day.

I've been having well publicized issues with sleeping. I wake up from body pain due to a weird position that I've moved into or I wake up from abdominal pain due to a weird position that I've moved into (or trapped gas...that's another popular one). But I do this probably 10 to 12 times a night that I can verifiably remember. This means that my normal morning routine, getting up at 4:30 to get out of the house by 6, is in serious jeopardy. So I asked my Dr. about some options for sleep management. I also asked him about options for anxiety with my impending "first" review coming up next week. To both quandaries he recommended the same thing...50mg of Benadryl. Yes. My mouth opened just as wide. But, he is a smart man, so at 3:00 Thursday night I took my 25mg (because I was taking it at 3 instead of at bedtime) of Benadryl and my pain pill. I slept until 6...like a rock. Apparently when you lose 35 pounds in 8 weeks, things hit you a bit differently than before. Then I fell back asleep until 6:45 when I woke up drenched in sweat...sheets and all. 

At this time I still intended to work. But the Benadryl had different ideas. After spending an hour in the bathroom (non Benadryl related) and a nose bleed that required extensive work to both control and contain, I thought that maybe a half day was in order. I grabbed some breakfast and soon after started passing out wherever I stopped moving. Tami, in her infinite wisdom, suggested that I take a nap. Usually I scoff at these ideas and I really wanted to get a half day of work in. But Tami and the Benadryl won out. After a nice Snoogle assisted nap and a shower, everything was again right with the world. Once I realized that I had slept it out of my system, I visited briefly with my cousin who also has recently been diagnosed with cancer and took another nap.  It was then that the day was too far gone to get any work done at all so I called it a full sick day.  That's what happens with this thing.  Sometimes you're on and sometimes you're not.  And you don't get to choose. 

I know what you're wondering...where are the accomplishments?  Well here they are...even though my day started me out on the wrong side of the bed, in the wrong direction and on the wrong foot...I managed to surprise myself. 

I finally got on the exercise bike. I only did 5 minutes and wondered if I would need help down the stairs (which I didn't). 

Then I did exercise bands while watching Rick Steve's Europe. 

Tami and Myah were out all day with errands so I was on my own. After all the work I had done, for some reason I really wanted a Taco Bell bean burrito. Like more than anything. But the girls were taking too long and I needed something to eat right then and there. It was then that I realized that I had my wallet and a set of car keys. I'm not strapped to the couch. Heck no!  So I did it. I went to Taco Bell and ordered 4 bean burritos. Then I came home and ate one. The entire thing. 

Then I helped with the laundry and cleaning the kitchen and had a semi full dinner. 

Then, at 8:00 pm I had another burrito!

And to top off my late day accomplishments? I finished off the Haagen-Dazs coffee ice cream. Oh yeah. 

But the biggest accomplishment?  I only lost a pound this week.  That's right.  I've been losing weight like a mad man, sometimes at the rate of a pound a day.  So to lose just one pound in an entire week is huge for me right now.  I'm hoping to limit the loss to just one more pound next week...or even gain my pound back!  Yeah!

None of these are earth shattering and it would be easy to look at each one and think, "That's all?"  Trust me, I do it everyday and everyday I have to remind myself (or Tami has to remind me because I'm too mired in self pity) that these are the things I need to focus on.  Each one is a win.  Each one is something that I haven't done before in my new reality.  Each and every one is important.

So the next time you do something small and seemingly insignificant...delight in it.  Take the win, even if it isn't a big one.

(I'll be trying like hell to follow this advice, but I have unrealistically high expectations and will still need Tami's help to get me out of the pity pit from time to time.)

Jake